Memory as a function of the living personality can be understood only as a reconstruction of past experiences and impressions in service of present needs, fears, and interests. Our perception of our identity is formed as a collection of memories, but what does it mean when those memories cannot be trusted as accurate?

My work analyzes the relationship between memory and identity, specifically exploring and understanding my own lived experience with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Clay is pushed, pulled, cut, taken apart, and put back together again. The clay forms a metaphor for the distorted repetition created through the constant, involuntary recall of an event. The ceramic body, much like the human body, remembers the sensation of touch in a way that is never truly lost, and can resurface under certain circumstances. With the initiation of the atmospheric firing, the clay experiences a series of traumas which cannot be erased, and life in the form of oxygen is stolen from the clay, immortalizing this moment.

As a practice in accepting that which cannot be changed and reacting to elements outside of my control, I retain some of the control to myself, while giving some up to the firing. This allows me to explore the relationship between the actions of an individual and the circumstances of their environment. The work allows me to explore what it means to have existed in a past so integral, yet so foreign to my present self.